A recent article in The New York Times looked into the reasons why it’s hard to make friends when we’re over the age of 30. Among them “people often experience internal shifts in how they approach friendship.
Self-discovery gives way to self-knowledge, so you become pickier about whom you surround yourself with, said Marla Paul, author of The Friendship Crisis: Finding, Making, and Keeping Friends When You’re Not a Kid Anymore.
From personal experience I know this is especially true with women. While playing the perfect wife, mother, career professional we’re missing the inner child within. At the end of the day we’re just too tired and disinclined to make new friends. Of course there’s Facebook, but as much as we hate to admit it, virtual friends don’t really count when push comes to shove.
Sometimes you’ve just got to let your hair down. So go ahead and phone a friend or make new ones. You’d be surprised at how many will share your tears and cheers.
Here’s my checklist for wavelength compatibility to the inner circle:
- Ask your husband to choose between dresses A and B. If he says A you wear B. If he says B you wear A.
- Wish your kids were awake when they’re asleep and sleep when they’re awake.
- Unlike Santa Claus and tooth fairies that don’t exist, PMS is for real and how!
- Stop berating your kids mid-sentence only to realise, “Oh no! I’m sounding just like Mum!”
- Hot chocolate fudge is still comfort food. It contains zero calories. Period.
- Beauty sleep is a necessity, not a luxury.
- You already know the answer to “Do I look fat in this?”
- Fifty Shades of Grey —read that, done that.
If you’ve felt a sense of deja vu, gone “yes”, or “hau” and ticked off at least five of the above, I hear you girl. Welcome to the ya-ya sisterhood.