The fear of being single at 30 is urging youngsters to make back-up plans because no one wants to see themselves growing old alone.
Waking up alone in the bed when you are 30 with no one to keep you company is the nightmare that many in their 20s share. Busy making friends and tasting freedom and independence in early twenties, one needs to hit late-twenties for the alarm bells to start ringing about the 30-year deadline. You make a pact with your best friend to get married to each other if neither of you are not married by a certain age. There are many who have opted for this before the inevitable 30 draws close.
“After having been in a few relationships, I’m fairly sure I’m not going to be settling down any time soon. And at 24, I’m not too worried about it. In fact, I think it suits me just fine. But a few years down the line, if I suddenly decide I’m ready and want to settle, I don’t want to start from scratch. There are single guy friends of mine who feel pretty much the same way. So we decided that at 30-35, if we are still single but ready for a commitment, we’ll just approach each other. Of course, there are many, many variables. He might find somebody. Or else, we have both may have changed and now can’t imagine spending our life together. So, nothing is set in stone but at the same time, having that back-up is comforting,” Meera Reddy, a student, says.
Back-up plans have now become the safety net which promises to keep you safe in times of need.
Shreya Dutt who works with Infosys, Bengaluru, says, “These back-up plans can change at any moment. We will go ahead with it only if both of us do not find anyone by the time we turn 30. I really think 30 is the sealing point. We can have our way with parents and friends till you turn 30 but after that the scenario changes. Everyone you know pushes you to get hitched while others start to question your sexual preferences. When you hit mid-twenties, you tend not to really jump into time-pass relationships because time is running out and wait for a serious guy to come along,” she says.
While there are others who have kept their options open and have made pacts with more than one person in case he/she gets hitched.
George Issac, a Delhi-based professional, says, “I have made pacts with five girls so that when I turn 34, I wouldn’t be alone. I haven’t dated a single one of the five and they are all my friends. But in case we turn 34 and are single, we can fall back on each other. The thought of being alone when you need a partner the most is very discomfiting.”
While these back-up plans to marry a friend if one is still single by a certain age seems like a something right out of a movie script, youngsters are opting for this pact to keep the fear of being unmarried at bay.
BACK-UP PLANS MADE ON TELEVISION
1. The popular television series Friends spoke about this arrangement quite early on in their seasons. In one of the episodes Joey Tribbianni and Phoebe Buffay make a pact to get married to each other if they find themselves single by the age of 40. The pact is sparked off by the fact that their friends Monica, Chandler, Ross and Rachel are too busy in their relationships to care about them. Feeling left out they come up with this idea.
2. Well, kids, here’s how it all started Aunt Robin and Ted were not just friends always in How I Met Your Mother. A romantic relationship between the two failed to blossom but what they decided was if they did not find a partner for themselves by the age of 40 then they would get married to each other. Somehow we get the feeling that would never happen right!
3. The Runaway Bride star Julia Roberts before turning wedding planner for her friend in My Best Friend’s Wedding also had decided on this pact with her friend.