All About Eve
My fiancée’s visit to India,last year and his comment on the ‘stuff’ he saw on Indian television is something I never will forget. “You guys are so funny,” he said laughing at the Indian songs and dances he saw.
I had no explanation whatsoever, and in fact felt silly as Shilpa Shetty and Govinda proudly displayed their dancing skills to the song LML baba LML. LML to all those who didn’t know is short for ‘Let’s make Love.’
A year later, last week, I managed to dump a few movies onto my tab, and saw Shutter Island (albeit a bit too late) last evening. Intrigued and amazed, this movie made me reflect on the kind of movies we produce. And unfortunately when I switched on the TV, Rowdy Rathore was warning me with his ‘Don’t angry me’, remark. Not one to get into altercations, I moved on to the next channel only to find Shah Rukh Khan singing Main Hoon Don, Main Hoon Don. Well, he can just say that instead of singing it out to his enemies I thought, and for a second imagined Al Pacino, singing Io Sono Don in Italian!
And yes, talking of our movies, how can I forget the item numbers! On one side, if the desi variants are enticing the men with their microscopic pallus and ghunghats, on the other side are the firang varieties — aka ‘Cheeni Bais’ asking us to watch their ‘imported kamariyas’.
Well, entertaining they are for sure, but my problem is with the after-effects of the ladies’ overdose. The problem is when my friends and I walk in public, into the snares of the heroes of the gallis. Their stares are almost like expecting me (or my friends) to commence our item numbers! And when I go to see my fiancé in Switzerland, far away from the influence of the bold world of Bollywood, every new friend I make there has just one comment to make – ‘Ah! We know your Bollywood movies!’ Ouch! Now is it time to sing a song in Switzerland?